Saturday, December 22, 2012

Christmas Music: The Bad

Well, you've seen the Good List, here are the songs that have made it onto my Bad List. I apologize in advance if one of your favorites has ended up on my Bad List but, to each his or her own I guess.

#15-Pine Cones and Holly Berries

Gross. It is no secret, I am not an Osmond fan, at all. One of the craziest mysteries is why people in England are such huge Osmond fans!

#14- Auld Lang Syne

I mainly just hate this song because I am not a huge fan of stalkers in the frozen food aisles in the grocery store.

#13- Here Comes Santa Claus- Elvis Presley

It isn't that I don't like this song, I do, when Elvis sings it though....?! He is the most irresponsible consonant user ever! Talk about a mouth full of marbles! (I realize if my dad ever sees this I am in sooooo deep).

#12- War is Over

This is going to surprise many people who know me well, I dare say. I may be one of John Lennon's biggest fans. And not just John, The Beatles! But I am sorry, when Yoko got invited to sing back vocals on the chorus, well, there was no saving this song.

#11- Blue Christmas

Seriously? Make everyone else blue with this song why don't ya!

#10- I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus

Kids have enough problems in this world that we are living in these days, they don't need something else to confuse them!

#9- Rockin' Around the Christmas Tree

I even like Brenda Lee, I blame the over use of this song on radio stations though. Or maybe I don't get the sentimental feeling when I hear voices singing lets be jolly?

#8- I Want a Hippopotamus For Christmas

Have you ever cleaned up after a hippopotamus? Just sayin'. Stick with the tinker toys!

#7- Any version of Last Christmas other than Wham's

AAAAHAHAHHAHHAHHHHHHHHH!! If this were a perfect world, this version would not even exist!

#6- 12 Days of Christmas Parodies

This song is already annoying enough.

#5- Grandma Got Ran Over By a Reindeer

*sigh* you can't drink too much egg nog.

#4- Do They Know it's Christmas

How dare I hate such a delightful 80's compilation?! Well, it isn't the singers believe me, I gave George Michael the #2 spot in my Good List for pete sake! And don't think it was Sting or Bono that caused it to end up here, it was the lyric writing! One sentence to be exact: "tonight thank God it's them instead of you"?! What?! I can honestly never say I have thanked God in my nightly prayers that someone else is going through something horrible instead of lyric fail!

#3- Christmas Shoes

There are too many inconsistencies in this song to make it be believable: a man standing in another line? a young boy who knows his mother's shoe size? a cashier who takes time to count pennies? I don't buy it.

#2- Any Christmas song sung by Celine Dion

When I was a kid, my mom used to shout at the top of the stair at me. Things like "Come up here and get your dinner", or "Is your room clean"...being a few floors down I could always tell that she was saying something, I just could never tell what it was exactly, it just sounded like a bunch of noise. That is what every Celine song does for me.

#1- The Little Drummer Boy

I have an idea, rather than saying "par rump pa pum pum" why not just use a drum?! Every time I here this song I die a little inside.

Well, there you have it. Hopefully no one is too upset with me and no one is curled up in a ball in the corner, mumbling about how I discredited your favorite Yuletide classic.

1 comment:

antimony said...

This cracked me up so much, I (almost) forgive you for making one my my all-time favorite holiday songs #14 :)

Hope you had a nice holidays!!